No pictures, no recipes. Just straight up.

I wasn't even going to post this to be honest. I even considered deleting this whole thing. Mainly because people are idiots. I can probably safely assume that the people who took time to be offended and leave comments about that were only reading my blog because they felt hated on. That's fine. we've all got something to say. Yes it's true, I can be a jerk and be offensive. I prefer to not be a sneaky, lying bitch about it. I like to be straight up. To me, it takes a bigger person to not be fake. So there is no recipe today. I've been cooking but pictures and recipes didn't seem to go along with this post. I don't even care if anyone reads this. I felt like I owed it to myself to let it be known, regardless of what gossip you heard, that  I'm not just a cold hearted, arrogant, self righteous bitch.And really, if you took my previous post to heart, and were really butt hurt about it, I just don't care and you're probably the type of person I didn't give a shit about anyways.

Sometimes I wake up and think "man, I just want to offended some people today." So I head to my jar full of "sensitive subjects" that are written out on slips of paper. I close my eyes and pull a slip out. Each "sensitive subject" gives me an idea of who I can pick on for that given day. Other days I wake up and think "man, I am a lucky girl with some awesome people in my life" and I go look at my little yellow sticky note on my fridge, that's actually been cut down into 1 quarter of its original size because the other size was just too big, I look at the list of people I actually like and then I think one nice thought about them. Then I still go to my jar full of slips and do what I always do, judge. 

I am gonna talk some crossfit here. I heart crossfit and I think it's a good time. I love how it portrays the image that a strong woman is a sexy woman. I've never been a petite flower; I've always been athletic and muscular. I was always very self conscious of myself because I felt like I was awkward and gross because I was "bigger" then most girls....and some of my ex boyfriends....(I even beat one at arm wrestling once-true story). Part of the reason I've fallen so in love with this culture is the open love and appreciation of a strong, hard working woman. There are some woman who do crossfit that absolutely inspire and motivate me. From my toes to my headband, they move me. I don't give a crap about Kristen Clever (I think she's a dude anyways) or Annie Thorsdoody. The women who inspire me are the ones I get to sweat with everyday. Ever since the crossfit open one woman in particular has motivated and inspired me more and more each day. Her name is Patricia, and she kicks ass. I'm not writing this to build some friendship bridge with Patricia or to impress anyone, I don't even think Patricia knows that I have this blog ;). I don't even know if anyone knows that I have this blog.... Wait, no I do know because I got some complaints about it last week.
Patricia is a mom and wife and a coach. She's about half my size and one of the sweetest firecrackers I've ever met. I wouldn't give her lip if she was my mom. During the open I had the opportunity to watch Patricia workout for the first time. I can't really express what I thought and felt when I watched her but I guess I could say that I was moved. Annnddd... If you know me, you know I'm not a mooshy, emotional, girly type. So keep that in mind as we get further along. I watched Patricia work her way through the 45# and 75# snatches. She made those her B. Next up were those 100# snatches. I watched this woman, who I think weighs about 100# herself take on that bar. She tried over and over again to get at least one snatch done at 100#'s. Not once while I watched her did I see a sign of defeat or disappointment. The only thing I saw was determination. In that moment there was no longer coach, mom, wife or Patricia. The only person I saw was a fierce athlete. An athlete determined to defeat the weight. I was impressed, I was awe struck, moved motivated and inspired. Wrap that all up into one and you've got Star, choked up and biting the inside of her cheek so she doesn't like, cry or something weird. 

It's not just the "team competitors" or "hard core athletes" or "crossfit douches" that can turn on "BEAST MODE". I know this. I don't think anyone has a claim on this Beast Mode so many speak of. But it's very rare to honestly see a chick turn it on. Sure you see woman working hard everyday, everywhere. But, going beast mode, that's different. (Not familiar with it? Google. it, I don't have time for that.)
It wasn't just seeing Patricia turn on beast mode. It is watching her stick around the box for 2 + hours to cheer for everyone and to help them. It is listening to her give the big dudes a hard time. It is watching her and her husband workout together while their daughter bounces around in princess costumes. She's just respectable, lovable and hard working. It is honestly people like Patricia that make me want to be a nicer, better person (never gonna happen though).
But this is what I love about crossfit. You don't just inspire people by how hard you work out. It's not just about that. It's about who you are in addition to that. Crossfit is not who you are. Your attitude, your family, your personality and your effort for that one hour, that's who you are.